people say “休息是为了走更长远的路”, through resting, we can rejunvenate ourselves and prepare for a longer and tougher journey ahead… but i’ll say “休息是为了不想再走路”. too many of us exploited the previous saying when they are taking a break from work. its just an excuse for people to feel guilt-free when they are skiving…

we take breaks because we are tired, and do not wish to carry on anymore. at the last moment before taking our break, how many of us actually have a plan for what they are going to go afterwards? i doubt many.. wats on our mind are full of how are we going to enjoy during the break. so, how are we preparing ourselves for “the longer journey” when we dont have a plan?

taking a 15 min break during every hour of work and constantly reminding ourselves that we are preparing for the road ahead is self-deceiving… we take breaks because our mind needs a rest, our body needs a rest, we dont want to do the work anymore etc…

休息是因为不想再走路 – huat

many of us were afraid of making mistakes. that is because most people like to appear good and impress others. making mistakes make them appear stupid. however, as ordinary beings, it is inevitable to make mistakes in life, and hence, these people dare not do what they wanted to because they were afraid of making mistakes.

take one of my FYP mates for example, they were so concerned abt making mistakes that they dare not attempt anything… “what if the results come out is not right?”, “what if my sample spoiled?”, “what if i damaged the machine?”, “correction? wont it leave a bad mark?”… come on, if every project succeed on the 1st trial, everyone would be famous. stop complaining your progress is slow.. u are slow because u are so afraid to make mistakes that you do not dare to try anything. nobody is perfect, results wrong? redo the test again, sample spoiled? remake the sample, machine damaged? it can always be repaired… the researchers there are even happier because they have a reason and justification to get new equipment. yes, some mistakes make are irrevesible and may “stain” the results even after doing correction… however, we can always justify it by saying we had made a mistake and did some correction. there are bound to have mistakes in experiments… dont tell me u are going to throw your book away if u found a small misprint in it??? simply use a correction pen to blanco over and correct the misprint. though theres a stain, but you had remedied the mistake.

my progress is faster than you because i dared to try. when i make mistake, i consult people and learn how to troubleshoot the mistake. through mistake, i actually learn more, i learnt how to counter the mistakes whereas those who are always getting right results did not learn. i spend less time waiting for people to give instructions. u might say i’m doing a much easier project, but do u know how many times i’ve failed in my experiments? i’ve tested 5 batches of samples for an experiment and failed all. you are what u think you are. if u thinks you had a tough project and did nothing but sitting there, do nothing but thinking that your project is tougher than others, then it will be really tougher.

“its okie to make mistakes, as long as you know where is your direction”
-my FYP supervisor

fucking tired… 9 consecutive days of work w/o rest… and 7 more working days to come… which means i dont have any break before school starts. yes.. people like my friend tanky are already complaining wif his 5 days work week. i’m going to work a consecutive of 16 days in a row.. great… what holds me on is not the money as i’m only paid on my weekend part-time job. its the smiles of the childrens and babies in the swimming pool.

yes, smiling is a miracle… sincere and truthful ones i mean… like a tired man who came back from work, he forgotton all his tiredness when he saw the smile on his baby’s face… the following is an abstract i took from the advertisement of a department store in New York…

“It costs nothing, but creates much
It enriches those who receive, without impoverishing those who give
It happens in a flash and the memory of it sometimes last forever.
None are so rich they can get along without it, and none are so poor but are richer for its benefits.
It creates happiness in the home, fosters good will in business, and is the countersign of friends.
It is to the weary, daylight to the discouraged, sunshine to the sad,and nature’s best antidote for trouble.
Yet it cannot be bought, begged, borrowed or stolen, for it is something that no earthly good to anybody till it is given away.
And in the last minute rush of Christmas buying some of our sales people should be too tired to give you a smile, may we ask you to leave one of yours?
For nobody needs a smile so much as those who have none to give.”

So… smile!!

good acdemics results = successful???
dont know since when, this equation has been instilled in the brains of many of us. it might be applicable in the 1970s to 1990s. but how applicable is it to us in this day??

i remembered when i was young, my parents forced me to study hard. “if you dont study hard, u end up collecting garbage”, i’m sure many of us had heard this “infamous” phrase from our parents. for those who have not, i envy you… i came from a rather traditional chinese background. as traditional chinese, its not a good practise to praise yourself too much, however, we tend to overdo this practice. since young, i have not gotton any praises or support from my parents other than acdemics. everything they wan to see is As in the report book. during primary sch, i’m very interested in science. during that time, there is a programme called “young scientist” or watever which i couldn remember. its a programme where primary school students were tasked to do a number of projects relating to different science field and once its completed, the student were awarded a bade and a certificate. there were 12 badges in total. me being an enthusiatic student in science, completed all 12 badges in 1 1/2 years… however, due to too much involvement in this projects, i flunked my exams. my parents were so furious that they tore up all the 12 certificates…

i excelled in sports during my primary school. during primary 4, i won a 2nd position in the 400m race during sports day and its my 1st ever trophy in my life. i bring it home happily and showed it to my parents. without any praises, they made the comment “玩就这么厉害，读书又不见得你会赢奖”. i’m dishearted and heartbroken… is acdemic really so important to them? and why do they like to find faults in our success?? not only my parents, in fact, most of us like to find faults… no matter how good something is, people are bound to find fault in it… and people remembers the mistakes we made more than the right things we did. i somehow agree wat my friend had said. he being a teacher, sometimes purposely made mistakes during lessons to make students remember. because being human, we tend to highlight on mistakes people made… it sounds rather logical in fact. so… when your lecturer or teacher makes a mistake during lesson, it may not mean they are lousy… they could have done it on purpose.

back to the acdemic issue. the mindset of our parents can be understandable as during their generation, they saw most people around them excel in their career had good acdemics qualifications. but now it might not be as applicable anymore. A degree back then is a fucking big piece of paper (not in terms of size, but in terms of value). but now, 1 out of 4 people have a degree, so what so big fuck abt that? being a slave of that piece of paper which costs 24k…

“Axiom Tech launches first Blu-ray disc production line in SE Asia” – Channelnews asia

this news article is on 18 july. Axiom Tech is investing a Blu-ray disc production line in Singapore. It is said that this is the first production line and will provide for most parts of Asia. this made me feel that there is really potential in my project. even though i might not end up in this industry after i graduate, but there there will be stuffs for me to brag abt during my interview for job in future since everyone are talking abt blu-ray nowadays.. :p this also inspired me to put in more effort in doing my FYP and treating it more seriously.

1.5 more weeks to sch reopen. and yet, i havent touch on my literature review yet. however, i would say i’m pretty on the fast track on my FYP… because i managed my time well, as i tried to minimize waiting time for my experiments or multitask in between waiting times whereas other student just wait and watch the equipment running. if theres really nothing to do, i’ll just hop ard the cubicles and “irritate” my supervisors and the other staffs… *grins* i grew to like DSI alittle. being a person with high S and high C, most of the time i’ll be able to keep myself on track. things i’m going to do in the last 1.5 weeks:
1) finish up my Lit review, presentation for the fortnightly meetup
2) draft up my resume and cover letters to prepare for campus recruitment
3) FYP, work, FYP. work, FYP and work.. $$$

i’m a routined person. i like my things to be properly planned although i dont usually follow my plan strictly. but i feel more secure if i had a plan. i like to work.. especially those 8-5 jobs…i enjoy the feeling of relaxing in pubs after one day of hardwork. some people might find it too routined… i agree… but i like this kind of life. :p thats y i’m a routined person.

i flipped today’s newpaper, one of the articles says one travel website rated singaporean girls are one ofthe top 10 hottest girls in the world because of their cute singlish accent. its abit contradicting as pagents from singapore have not won any awards in the miss universe. but this doesnt mean i disagree with the article. in fact, i do find our girls quite attractive acutally… they are elegant and independant… ermm that does not include singaporean ah lians.. however, ah lian does have an attractive side of them :x.. yah i sound like a “bao ga liao” right??? :X i would like to quote a famous phrase from my buddy david chen, “天下哪有真情在，凡是有洞我就爱” haha sounds chim??? decipher it yourself.. :p

another strifle in my tkd club again… regarding money matters *again*. i seen it in my previous club, i witness it in my present club. *shakes head* tkd supposed to be a sport, interest and passion is required. when money comes into play, things get complicated. like what our MM says “theres no forever friendship, there’s only forever interest”. if the common interest is not there, friendship and any other relationship breaks apart. yes, the world is that practical… even Venerable Shi Ming Yi get into trouble with money issues. as a buddhist myself, i feel disappointed. all the values our shi fu taught us, all the moral ethics we’ve heard from the religious people and want us to practise them. however, they who instill us these moral values do not follow it themselves.. it just makes me feels disgusted. *shakes head* aft the NKF and this Ren Ci incident, more people will be reluctant to donate to charity.. and the ones suffering are the patients… the root of evil is causing most of the problems we have today…

today marks my 1 year of service with SSC as a part-time lifeguard. i realise there is this change in me. when i first came to work, i have the mentality of just to sit and watch and earn money. i find it wierd how come the full-timers getting flared up when the pool users doing stupid acts which endanger their life… arnt lifeguards supposed to provide help when they get hurt? as i work, i get to understand that prevention is better than cure. it is always better to stop the pool users from endangering their lifes. this keep the person from hurting himself, and saves the trouble of u attending to him. and during the recent shifts, i started to get pissed when pool users do not follow the rules.. and doing dangerous act… i get pissed not because i have to go through all the troubles after that… i get pissed because i’m concerned with their life and truly understands the role of a life-saver… i guess i’ve started to become part of the lifeguard family… :p

time flies… 2 days of break ended… and i feel that i have not slacked enough 😡 lol thats the greediness of human beings. i supposed to use these 2 days to read up more journal articles and embark on my literature review, however i end up slacking through. progress in my literature review: 0%. sigh… i would not have time to do it over the weekends as i’ll be working on both days. its quite taxing working on both weekends. i’m thinking of requesting to work only on 1 day each week, but that would mean a loss of $200+ each month… Being a participant of the previous standard chartered marathon, i am entitled to a 30% discount if i were to participate in this year’s marathon. which means i only have to pay $45.50 instead of the usual $65. i’m rather tempted to participate again. but the specialist advised me to cut down on running and long distance walking as it will aggravate my slipped disc condition. damn.. i’m feeling fucking useless…

i met up wif lishan today and had our dinner @ Thai Express in vivo-city. Its my 1st time dining in Thai Express… i would not give their food a good rating as i find it was just simply ordinary and costy. seems like vivo-city is going to be my 2nd home as i’ve been visiting there quite frequently since its opening. after our dinner, we had a walk from mt faber to alexandra arch. i requested it because i had not seen the colourful arch during the night. aft a 2 hour walk, we reached the alexandraarch, its really beautiful and the colour is constantly changing… i took a few pictures of it while its at different colours.

its blue….

White….

Purple.. and…..Red!! :p

Thank you… lishan for accompanying me for the night, listening to my rumbling and sharing your problems.. :p i know this long walk tire you out… take care and rest well friend :p

playing a soccer game w/o proper warming up and cooling down = aching body…
yeah.. thats wat i’m experiencing right now… my ankles were loosening, my knees were aching, my thighs were stiff, my shoulders were stiff, and myback is aching… damn… how i wish i was 3 years younger where all the warming ups and cooling exercises were not required. damn…

took a 2 days break from my FYP.. which means i dont have to go DSI on thursand fri!! finally i can rejuvenate for my burnt weekends last week and ting week. time flies and 2 more weeks to school reopens, i’m already feeling so tired. i cant imagine how will life be when school reopens. shag, fatigue, tired… *shakes head*

the maths which the primary sch kids were doing were becoming tougher and tougher. today, huat asked me to solve a match qn from his student’s prelim exam. it took me 15 damn minutes to solve it… and i’m actually really cracking my brains on it… the worse part of it is no algebras allowed…

i’m drained… didn really get to rest over the weekends… worked the whole of saturday, grading on sunday morning and tanked kai yao in the afternoon till night… the only moments of slience was the 140mins watching red cliff in the cinema… erm.. no… even that 140mins he is not silent… he kept emphasizing how “smart” he was in the show… damn…
lesson learnt: never sit beside tky while watching a movie

as usual, he kept his throne of the legend of MSE intern in micron… its fascinating to hear how great an impact he is when he was only attached to micron for about 6 months… *impressed* he finally cut down on bodybuilding, cars and wrestling in our talks. he talks to us abt his FYP and his “glorious” days in micron which we were rather interested.. at leats its much better than bodybuilding, cars and wrestling

i left DSI early today because the equipment died and all other equipment were booked. i thought i could have some rest since i’m leaving early… when i reached home, i sticked my butt to the computer, playing DOTA… *argh evil DOTA* i think i should delete it from my PC.. fucking drained… Darren smsed me for soccer tml night considering that i would not be able to rest on this weekends again… however i feel quite bad rejecting him as i had already missed 3 sessions… i think i shall be a “sleeping player” on tml night :p

love is such a complicated matter, causing hurt and distress to people if not well handled… and even if its well handled, yet it will still have to depend on the other party. however, people still wants to fall in love… there is this chinese saying goes:

人道相思好，
相思令人老，
几番相思量，
还是相思好。
funny humans…