1) i feel demoralized whenever i see my pay-slip. Not that i’m greedy, but its seriously not enough when i have to settle study debts and family allowance. This amount would be sufficient if i’m using it alone. according to my control sheet, 80% of my monthly salary is being spent within 20% of the days in the month, thus leaving me with miserable savings. colleagues and staffs kept asking me not to give up on you, spend more money to groom myself and pamper you. at this situation, i dont think i’m able to achieve.
2) Daddy admitted to hospital this morning 2am. i hate my inability to give him a more efficient medical service.
Once again, i’m being straddled in this “money is king” issue. daddy is in critical condition… i sent him to A&E 2am this morning and waited till 5am until he persuaded me to go home to sleep. i was reluctant to go home, but i gave in in order to appease him. doctor says will operate on him ASAP as he is in critical condition. what does ASAP mean? what does “Accicident & Emergency” means when he has to stay in the ICU with tubes all over him and groaning in pain for more than 18 hrs and yet the doctor has yet attend to him?
down to earth, its the money issue… we could not afford private hospitals and thus have to go thru these sufferings. I hate this!!
Finally see you online today…
i want to ask you to watch movie, to visit chinese garden on this coming saturday…
yet i just cant bring myself to say to u.
maybe its afraid of rejection, maybe you might just snub me *again*
fuck it… knowing i would get anything in reply, i just whack it anyway…
*i’m still hoping to get some reply from you*
even if it is a rejection, at least there’s some response.
workload getting tough. my upper study has promoted… leaving me behind to take the lead.
I have more power now, i can grab any worker and screw them and yet they dared not say a word. but more responsibilities and more work. so much so that i dont even have the time for a coffee break. with everything else increasing, my pay does not increase… to think that i’m still a trainee and yet i’m being thrown into the jungle for my own survival…
Fortunately tertiary education plays a part. not in terms of the stuffs i’ve learnt in school, but the same status and level of frequency with engineers in the client company. this enable me to entertain and negotiate better terms with them.
Over my failed relationship
Over the death of my uncle…
why my relationship dont last?
i could not get over even after 3 long weeks. my mind couldn settle down…
thinking of u really hurts me…
why i couldn earn enough to let my mum retire?
her boss might not even allow her leave to attend my uncle’s funeral…
she’s crying so sadly and it hurts me alot…
